Why I Decided to Come Out
Not to be theatrical, but I was studying Hamlet for school and the words "To thine own self be true" struck me like one of the swords at the end of the play. I realized that while I was being true to myself practicing in private, I wasn't being true to myself when I mumbled something incoherent when anyone asked me what my personal religious beliefs were. So I decided to come out of the broom closet. Granted, it took me 3 years to do it, but I thought about it a lot before I did anything.
What I Said and Did
First I came out to my friends - it seemed easiest. It was - they really didn't care about the fact that I'm Druid, but said that they were happy that it seemed I wasn't hiding something anymore - they said I seemed happier. I was, and not because I needed them to know but because I wasn't hiding anymore. It was liberating. It took me longer to tell my family. They didn't believe me the first time. Half of them believed me the second time (a few months later) and it was my mother who took the longest to believe me. She still prays for my soul, and still thinks this is a phase, but we're working on that. Slowly, but we're working on it. I didn't go from jeans and tee shirts to goddess wear every day, I didn't end every conversation with Blessed Be - basically, I didn't throw it in their face. I just didn't hide what I was doing anymore. I didn't put my altar away when company was coming over. I didn't hesitate to post on my facebook that I was going to a circle this weekend, or whatever. I started posting "Blessed (insert holy day here)" on the appropriate days. I wore my oak leaf with pride. I didn't hide my tarot deck. I just did the things I would do normally, and didn't hide anything.
Advice
- Don't throw it in their face - you're not trying to alienate them.
- Do educate them on your religion, but only when they ask.
- Look for other people who do what you do but realize that you are not a missionary out to convert people now.
- Don't get defensive. This doesn't help anyone, and doesn't help your cause.
What I'd Do Differently
I would have sat my mother down and told her first. The biggest part of our argument was that I didn't tell her first. Not that I wasn't Catholic, not that I'm bi (which I told her at the same time) but that I didn't tell her first. We're past that now, but I think it would have been easier.
